Primate Adventure-aka SHIT!

It’s not uncommon for me to have incredibly vivid dreams. Well, I had one last night…that on some levels is probably best forgotten, but I think it’s too funny not to share.

We had a big family get together this weekend, and perhaps that influenced my dream. Anyways, I dreamed the family (including my Nelson cousins who were my best buds growing up) went to the zoo and got to go on a new special primate adventure. It was really cool, at first it was like watching donkey kong come to life, with these primates swinging through the trees in their jungle environment. Well, the adventure, was that you you got to join the primates…and experience playing in the jungle with them first hand. The safety guy in me thought…ooohh…this is dangerous, but it looked like fun!

So we gear up and enter the cages and what not…but no primates. Just monkey poop every where. Well, I think the primates were some sort of ape, but monkey poop sounds nicer than ape shit. So yeah, we swing through the jungle, looking for primates…and all we find are their remains. There was even this pond you could swim through…that the primates just LOVED to play in. You guessed it…floaters everywhere. Somehow Linda and Blair’s old house was in the exhibit too…covered with…yeah...on the floor, on the walls, in the kitchen...

So we went through this shower toward the end, but it wasn’t especially effective…and eventually I woke up at 2:30 in the morning terrified that I would always be covered with ape shit. There was a highlight to this. Right after the shower (in the dream) we actually did finally get to see some primates. But they were rather strange. Imagine the cutest monkey you’ve ever seen…crossed with a zucchini…and that speaks English. I think…don’t quite remember what they were talking about.

Unfortunately, after waking up worried about being covered in shit…I had an OH SHIT experience. No, PJs are perfectly clean. More of one of those “wake and worry” ‘cause when you woke up you immediately thought of something you didn’t think of before…that maybe was really important. So, the rest of my morning pretty well sucked. Too tired to be able to think things through better and realize that there is no point to worrying…but too worried to actually sleep.

Feeling much better now…worry-wise at least…but kind of a crappy way to spend a morning:)